you dont remember an old friend until they die.
people think "oh i hope no ones hurt" when they hear a police siren in a nice neighborhood.
they also think "i wonder who got shot?" or "fucking niggers" hearing the same thing downtown.
people dont decide to tell you things until the moment you feel happy and secure. it fucks you up and makes you second guess where you are, everything.

well fuck you.
fuck all those people that decided to tell me how amazing i am, how pretty i am, how much they miss me, how much they like me, how they wish that they could be with me now.
where were you when i hated myself?
where were you when i was alone?
where were you when i didn't feel pretty or amazing or wanted?
i was perfectly fine until four people decided to tell me this all at once.
decided to tell me i shouldnt be where i am or with the person im with.
thank you for the compliments but again
fuck you.
you were too late.
try to think quicker next time.

ps: you made part of me hate again.